Indulgence Stew

Vacation was delightful. Five days of basking and snuggling with the family. It was so easy to feel good about the pilot because this was a "no writing" vacation. So, every time my mind wandered back to the show I would have waves of delight and hope, inspiration and knowing that all would be well. Amazing how easy it is to feel good about it when I'm not ACTUALLY doing it. Then I came home and stared at my computer screen until my eyes bled.

I got a new idea over dinner on Monday night and have been working with that all day today. Actually, it's fine, I think it will work, there are things about it that I love but it's starting to lean into more of a sci-fi realm which is unchartered territory for me. I'm starting to think I just need to make a decision and move on a premise, whether it's air tight or not and let the first run at this thing suck giant donkey ass if it needs to. Cuz, I ain't kidding when I say this is going to send me to an early grave. And, it's making me feel like I may never be able to accomplish this task, which is...well, retarded.

I just want to feel spectacular about my idea, I want to run around my bedroom squealing with delight, clapping my hands like a mad woman, rosey cheeked and gitty at the depth and genius of my Brand New Pilot. But at this point its feeling like gum with no flavor and all I want to do is SPIT IT OUT. Or get new gum. And at this point, there is no new gum. Be damned if I'm gonna completely abandon the idea of a show about angels. Forget it. That decision has been made.

So tomorrow I start fresh. I'm going to double fist it: one page will be my one hour premise idea and on the other page with be my half hour premise idea, and whoever is most fully ready to go to the next stage by midnight, wins.

Enough of this hand wringing and lip biting. Behold as I go boldly into the land of Original Pilot WRITING (vs. worrying).

Words I Wish I Had Written: "All my life whenever it comes time to make a decision, I make it and forget about it." (Harry S. Truman)

I need a little more Harry in my life...